Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Retro Tune of the Day: Peter Gabriel & Kate Bush "Don't Give Up" A special dedication for Amanda & her mother

Coming from Peter Gabriel's 1986 album "SO", this is one of my favorite songs of all time.  It is a beautiful duet with the amazing Kate Bush.

I'd like to dedicate this song to My friend Amanda who just learned her mother has breast cancer.  Don't give up!  My thoughts are with you and your family.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Michael Moore's New Film: CAPITALISM: A LOVE STORY

"Capitalism: A Love Story," Michael Moore's look at the high cost of free enterprise on average Americans. Critics and pundits can fact-check and argue the fine print of this film until they're blue in the face, but the state of this nation -- where 1 percent of Americans control more wealth than the bottom 95 percent combined -- speaks for itself. Moore's inimitable style assures that this film will only preach to the choir, but I wish it were mandatory for all Americans so they learn about the way Citigroup -- which took $45 billion in handouts from the taxpayers -- giddily boasts about the United States' being a "plutonomy" (their only regret? that those of us in the bottom 95 percent have equal power to the rich on Election Day), the "dead peasant" life insurance policies many corporations take out on their employees (you die, they profit) or the Second Bill of Rights FDR proposed for Americans but died before achieving -- a job with a living wage, freedom from unfair competition and monopolies, a home, medical care, education and recreation -- rights that we made standard in our rebuilding of Europe after World War II, but never bothered to ensure for ourselves. My only complaint is that the film left me with an unbearable sense of helplessness rather than even a hint of inspiration, and not even the clever Mr. Moore seems to have any ideas on how to turn that around.
[Via Kenneth in the 212]

It's the end of the world as we know it, and I feel fine: News of the Weird

Under "Compelling Explanations"

Improbably Successful Pick-up Line: In September, school officials in Australia's Queensland state said they were investigating an incident earlier in the year in which two teenagers had consensual sex that they recorded on a cell phone camera. The girl reportedly said she was convinced to lose her virginity out of fear that the world would soon end as a result of the scheduled re-start of the Large Hadron Collider near Geneva, Switzerland, later this year. [Courier-Mail (Brisbane), 9-2-09] 


Under "People With Issues"


Three physicians, reporting in The Canadian Journal of Urology in July, described how they handled an emergency-room patient who arrived with a ballpoint pen in his urethra. The man, 57, had assumed that the insertion would be pleasurable, and when it wasn't, thought initially that maybe the pen was not in far enough. After pushing further, to even greater discomfort, he thought that if he pushed it all the way through, it would exit in his rectum, where he could remove it more easily. (Actually, they're not connected.) Doctors removed the pen with the same procedure used to remove kidney stones. [Canadian Journal of Urology (July 2009) via Neurotopia blog, 8-28-09]  

[Via Chuck Shepherd's News of the Weird]


LOOK MA, NO HANDS!

Those wacky, inventive Japanese have done it again!  This is for all you multitaskers & chronic masturbators with carpal tunnel!  Behold the SOM....available in both a men's and women's version for the adventurous wanker in your life (remember, Christmas is right around the corner!).

Now, I'm of course wondering if my Kitchen Aid attachments will work on this and I can whip up a batch of special brownies when it's served it's other purpose!


Here's the company's description for the men's version:

Men's SOM


1.

Completely hands free : high performance onanie machine.
2.
You can sit on the seat and enjoy as you like with hands free.
3.
Any speed is available for up-down slide movement
(free level between 90 and 180 / min)
4.
Adjustment free to the height of body (290-340mm)
5.
Vibration of controller point (free level) adjustment free.
6.
Up-down slide of 65mm width.

(The Lady's SOM is described as "A high performance piston machine"  hahahaha!)

Now, you're probably wondering "what's inside that thing?" Well, they cover that too!

"The material of hole and dildo is " septon " it is so safe that used in medical service.
It is new material that soft, strong, elastic and enjoy yourself with special gel and lotion for SOM. Inside of hole : innumerable pleats and protuberance excite you! It's soft touch gives you more luxurious pleasure the "real" does."

Wow, that sounds AWESOME! Unfortunately, I don't think it's proportions were made for the Western market so I'll just have to wait til this thing comes in adult sizes.

LCC Update: Holy Crap, Learnin' Is $pendy!

Wow!  I just crunched the numbers for the total cost of my course and the supplies I need for it vs. the financial aid money I'll be getting.  Silly me had delusions of a new laptop or maybe a weekend trip to Chicago, perhaps dinner out or a great new pair of shoes....this was a serious reality check!

The great news is that I qualify for the highest amount for the Pell Grant, the bad news is I thought I got the whole thing at once.  Apparently they split your "award" between 2 terms....bastards, don't they know I NEED want the new Donald J. Pliner boots!  Anyway....I floated, nay, crashed back to reality and figured the smart/responsible thing to do was to get all my supplies ($239), get my car insured, new tires and tabs through 2010 ($600), save for the CNA exam ($200) and, oh yeah, then there's the course fee ($336) and finally tuition ($1231)

Grand Total................$2270 *YIKES!*

My "award" total for this term..............$2675

So, not much left for "living expenses" after all is said and done.  I am quite grateful and lucky to have gotten the Pell Grant money, it could certainly be a lot worse and I can definitely make it work, it's just going to be a little harder than anticipated.

Monday, September 28, 2009

LCC Update: Finally some encouraging news!


Today I logged into my LCC Acct. to check Financial Aid status, which for weeks has been "under review", and it has finally gone through! Although the course is still full to capacity, I called the Nursing Dept. and was again encouraged to attend the first day of class and told that chances of someone dropping and me getting in this term are very high...more good news!

The not so great news is that I underestimated the cost of the course by a little over $200 and the course fees and tuition do not cover any other supplies such as textbooks, scrubs, lab kit, etc... And to get my car legal, insured and tires replaced will be approx. $600 None of which will be available to me until I am officially registered which looks like that wont happen until the course is under way.

The other good news concerning Financial Aid is that instead of the 4-6week wait for disbursement as I was initially told, it will be less than 2 weeks to get the balance of my Pell Grant after course fees and tuition...this is fantastic news, I only wish I could get it sooner but thanks to some asshole waiting until the last minute to drop the bloody course I'm screwed.

Oh well, I'm trying to stay positive and focus on the GOOD news I received today as the last couple weeks I have been really stressing out over all of this and wondering if it was even going to be possible. I'll keep you posted!

This Week In Holy Crimes [Via Joe.My.God]

Over the last seven days...

South Carolina: Pastor John David Helmuth busted in internet sting for trying to meet what he thought was a 13 year-old girl for sex.

Connecticut: Rev. Iura Godenciuc charged with defrauding school district of $76K.

New York: Father William Blasingame pleads guilty to stealing $86K from his diocese for plastic surgery and botox. Linked photo proves he did not spend wisely.

Massachusetts: Rabbi Stanley Zusia Levitt charged with sexually assaulting two pre-teen boys.

Illinois: Father Fred Lenczycki, the first Catholic priest ever declared "sexually violent," has been released from prison after only five years after confessing to sexually assaulting over 30 boys.

Pennsylvania: Rev. Vincent Navorro Meekin charged with embezzling funds donated to build his church a new roof.

Arizona: Father Dale Fushek to have five separate trials for sexual crimes against minors. Bonus: Fuskek is the founder of Teen Life Ministries.


Illinois: Father Daniel McCormick may be indefinitely confined under the state's Sexually Violent Persons Act. McCormick is due for release after confessing to molesting five boys ages 8-12, but the state fears he will reoffend.

North Carolina: Pastor Robert Reaves has fired his attorneys and wants to defend himself in the 2008 stabbing murder of a woman who was seeing a man Reaves was reportedly interested in. Reaves has previous convictions for sexually abusing boys.

New Jersey: Rev. John Harris Jr. charged with sexually harassing a church employee who says she was fired for refusing his advances.

North Carolina: Pastor Brian Andrew Klein sued by parishioner who claims he coerced her into a sexual relationship when she was a minor.

Israel: Rabbi Avichai Zehavi under house arrest after four families come forward with allegations of sexual abuse of minors.

New York: Angelo Serrano, Director of Religious Education at St. Lucy - St. Patrick Roman Catholic Church, charged with molesting 10 year-old boy. Cops say there may up to 17 other victims.

This Week's Winner -
Oklahoma: Pastor Ted Haggard tells local newspaper that he is now "completely free of homosexual compulsions." Haggard and his wife have been holding weekly "meetings" with fellow Christians in his Colorado Springs home. Haggard: "As a church, we're God's primary hand to help people with sin problems, whether it be gluttony, pride, hate, high-mindedness, selfishness, immorality (such as) fantasizing, porn, masturbation, homosexuality, bisexuality."

[Via Joe.My.God]

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Un-Lucky Star: Cynthia Gibb

Oh HELL to the no she didn't!  Check out this fuckery train wreck of a cover "performed" by Fame Tv cast member and song murderer Cynthia Gibb.  My ears are still bleeding from this shit!

Written by Madonna and released in April, 1984 as the 5th. and final single off her 1983 debut Madonna, "Lucky Star" reached #4 on the Billboard Hot 100 chart.

This horrific cover version comes courtesy of a season of the Tv series Fame, based on the hit movie from 1980.

Lip Dub: Université du Québec à Montréal "I Gotta Feeling"

Just learned about this new "phenomenon" called lip dub...here's a great example that was filmed in ONE take!

A lip dub is a type of video that combines lip synching and audio dubbing to make a music video. It is made by filming individuals or a group of people lip synching while listening to a song or any recorded audio then dubbing over it in post editing with the original audio of the song. There is often some form of mobile audio device used such as an iPod. Often, they look like simple music videos, although many involve a lot of preparation and are well produced. The most popular lip dubs are done in a single unedited shot that often travels through different rooms and situations in, say, an office building. They have become popular with the advent of mass participatory video content sites like YouTube.

Retro Tune of the Day: De La Soul "The Magic Number"

A truly awesome song and hip hop classic from 1989!  Remember when hip hop was fun and had a positive message?  This song is one of my faves and I cannot believe it's over 20 years old!

"The Magic Number" is a 1990 single by De La Soul, originally recorded in 1988 and first released on their 1989 album, 3 Feet High and Rising, with the chorus based on a segment from the children's show "Schoolhouse Rock!", written by Bob Dorough. In the song, the trio state that the number three is the magic number.  The song heavily samples songs and vocal samples originally sampled in "Lesson 3" by Double Dee and Steinski, as well as sampling "Lesson 3" itself.  (you'll also notice some other samples from this kick ass funk that were used as samples by several other groups....fun!)

The song reached #18 on the Billboard Hot R&B/Hip Hop chart,but charted a respectable #7 on the UK singles chart.

Facebook Etiquette: Things I think you should know

So...yes, Facebook is great.  I'm glad it's there and it's a useful tool to keep tabs on several people and what's going on in their lives.  In fact, I'm probably on here way more than I should or need to be... a self professed internet addict!  However, I do not believe it's a replacement for real world relationships and some of the same social rules that apply in real life should be adhered to on FB as well.  So, here is MY list of Facebook Etiquette, though I'm sure it's not all inclusive as new things crop up almost daily.  Feel free to add your own in the comments section!

Facebook Ettiquette:

1) Do not be a friend whore!  It's not a competition, you don't score "coolness factor" by having over 500 "friends" on your FB page.  In fact, I think you seem more desperate than anything!  Unless you are a major celebrity (and chances are you're NOT) you should get real and do a massive purge of your "friends" list!

2) Do not be a friend "stealer"! (this ties in to #1) You really should only be friending people you actually know in the real world, not adding everyone of the friends of all of your friends...this is fucking ridiculous!  If you don't know them or have a clue about them as a person, then WHY are you adding them?  This just annoys me to no end, I mean really, are you really keeping up with the 758 people in your friends list? Doubtful.

3) Do not send a friends request or approve a friends request for someone you have no intention of ever communicating with!  I'd like to think that if you've added me or approved my request to add me that you might actually give a damn.  It's perfectly acceptable to ignore or deny a friends request.  I'd much prefer to never be added then to be added under the false impression that you might actually care about what's going on in my life now.

4) If you've added someone and they've commented on your posts or posted something thoughtful on your page or perhaps even sent a message....TAKE THE FUCKING TIME TO COMMENT BACK!! It's so rude to completely ignore someone YOU APPROVED in the first place!  I have people on my friends list like this and have before (they got purged) and let me tell you, it kinda hurts my feelings that I receive zero response from you when I take the time to comment or post something thoughtful.  If you have no interest then just delete me!  I'd much rather know I'm not receiving any communication because you are simply no longer on my friends list than to know you are there and just don't give a shit enough to ever comment....you will be purged!

5) I do not care to know you have taken 47 quizzes today!  Did you know you have the option of NOT posting the results to everyone?  Yes, ok, I am guilty of posting a couple here and there but when that's ALL I see as your status updates for 12 straight hours, I will most likely hide your status updates!

6) Posting inappropriate status messages.  If your status messages (or the nasty little sex quizzes you are taking and posting the results) is anything of a sexual nature or perhaps stating you passed your herpes test....that is TMI, people!  I do not care that according to a Facebook quiz the part of the human anatomy you are is the labia majora....it's just gross and inappropriate!  GROW UP!

7) Constantly posting "poor me" status messages...UGH!!  I'm sorry you are having a bad day, truly, and it's ok to know this once in a while, we've all been there and sometimes it's nice to receive encouragement from a few people.  However, some people take this to the extreme and post NOTHING but the bad shit that is happening to them and this gets OLD!  Take it from someone with bi-polar disorder, I fucking know what a downer life can be, trust me!  And if you want to compare notes in that category chances are I will win!  But for the most part I know people don't want a Debbie Downer on their friends list to get bummed out by every time they log on!  It gets to a point when it's obvious that you are just fishing for people to comment and make you feel better....there's only so much encouraging other people I can take....got it?

8) Now, it may seem hypocritical to have this one after the diatribe I just went on over something similar, but....if someone is having a rather shitty day and once in a blue moon does post something to that effect and is not a habitual abuser of this technique, would it kill you to take 5 sec. and comment?  I had a shit day last week and less than 5% of my "friends" on facebook commented.  Fucking rude and pathetic!  (says I)   That just makes one feel even worse.

9) Do not post old, bad or potentially compromising and or embarrassing  photo's of someone without first getting their explicit permission!  This will get you deleted or start a virtual war in the least!  It's not cute or funny, it's just plain rude and disrespectful.  No thanks, I do not want a pic of me passed out on some bathroom floor 20 years ago circulating the internet!


Ok, that's all I can think of off the top of my head for now.  Below is a video that may cover a few more things as well... As stated in the preface, I'm sure more will arise or perhaps I've left some out so feel free to offer your additions, comments, feed back or what have you in the comments section of the post (if you leave a comment, be sure to subscribe to the comments to get updated when other people comment on the same post)
 

Saturday, September 26, 2009

I Hate Your Blog! : MC Frontalot Godfather of Nerdcore

I just discovered this guy, MC Frontalot, the creator or "Godfather" of hip hop sub genre "nerdcore".  Damian Hess (born December 3, 1973), better known by stage name MC Frontalot, is a San Francisco hip hop musician and self-proclaimed "world's 579th greatest rapper".  This should make up for the Tom OC post from yesterday....I'm lovin' this guy!  "I Hate Your Blog" is from his Secrets from the Future album released in 2007

After "discovering" MC Frontalot and preparing for this post by reading his Wiki pg. I learned of the nerdcore documentary "Nerdcore Rising", so I decided to watch.  Here is a quote by a "nerd" in the firat 5 min. of the film describing nerdcore.... "Nerdcore is like playing Halo while getting a blowjob from Hello Kitty"  LMFAO!!! 


Update: looked around a little more and of course had to include this song too! "I Heart Fags" from his 2005 debut Nerdcore Rising  *NSFW*

Pimpin Rides: Wal-Mart parking lot

These are some phat rides found in Wal-Mart parking lots...sweet!

 
 

Free to good home: Filthy Tank & contents!

This fish tank is an albatross around my neck, a grimy moldy guilt inducing vile infuriating albatross. Except instead of being a sign of a transgression of my own against nature, it represents the irresponsibility of my flaky self-absorbed douchebag previous roommates who left it at the apartment after moving out. I've fed the depressing inhabitants (seriously, is there anything that makes you want to fling yourself in front of a fast approaching train more than looking at fish in a tank?) for the past year, but am moving and will be damned if I take them with me.

So, please, take this burden from me.

Details:

Tank: Standard 5 gallon glass fish tank. Covered. in. filth. Comes with the whole filter apparatus (which probably needs a new filter pad or whatever those things are called). Also has a bubble machine that apparently serves to distract the fish from the meaninglessness and futility of their existence.

Contents: Various rocks, Buddha head, plants, and all that other kitschy crap my douchebag roommate put in the tank. She was an art student with a mullet, so I assure you it is hip to the point of nausea. Also worth mentioning (I know, no pets allowed in the free section, but seriously, fish don't count): Tumor Fish and Twitch. The former: white angel fish with a large tumor on the left side of belly. This thing is a scientific wonder and will probably outlive us all. We thought it would die 1.5 years ago, the lump on its side constituting at least 30% of its body mass and forcing it to swim with the top of its body at a approx 70 degree angle to the right. The mass disappeared around 7 months ago but then grew back in February. I do not recommend staring into T.F's cataract film covered black eyes for more than 30 seconds lest you lose all will to live. The latter: Twitch is some generic fish that will never be remotely as interesting as T.F. but moves in spastic fits of motion.

All of this can be yours (Joy of Joys) if you are able to come by and deal with moving the cursed thing by Sunday (the 26th) evening. Email me if interested and I can send you pictures, details.

[Via Best of Craigs List]

Saturday Morning : Cartoon


[Via xkcd]

Friday, September 25, 2009

That's Mr. Hip Hop to you! : Move over Jay Z here comes Tom OC!

Tom OC - Ireland's biggest gangsta rap star sensation (not really). Tom OC dropped (that's gangsta rappa' talk YO) his newest single on CD and it has already become one of the top ranked....things to laugh at in Ireland. Before you tantalize your ears with Tom OC's gift, read his introduction:

**THIS IS AN UNMASTERED ROUGH VERSION AND VIDEO As A SAMPLER FOR THE DEBUT ALBUM WHICH IS DROPPIN IN LATE FALL 09! PLEASE DONT PLAYA HATE LIKE SOME OF THE OTHER COMMENTATERS HAVE, I AM JUST STARTING OUT IN DA RAP GAME AND THE FULL ALBUM GONE BE DONE SOON!! DONT FORGET TO COP THE ALBUM
This video is an ode to my hero.
RIP 2pac
Tupac is about to get into a grave, so he can roll over. Now, COP THIS:

Why does Tom OC sound like a dog meowing into a fan while having a seizure? Shit, I need to stop playa hatin' SON! And if you can't get enough of Tom OC, COP his website.
"Chillin with my homes! GANGSTA! bitchs!" - Tom OC


[Via Dlisted]

Memory lane: Steve's visit

So an old friend from wayyyyyyyyyyy back in the day came into town from Chicago and we decided to take a trip through East Lansing and see what had changed, what remained the same and in some cases what needed to go but was still around for some reason.  So after a quick lunch at BK we drove into town and walked around by all the places we used to hang in the 80's.  Here are a few pix:

Pinball Pete's, cannot believe this place is still open!  It's just not the same though, too clean & quiet and sadly the old photo booth is gone :(
 
 
Steve & I in my back yard (I'm holding Gromit aka Pig)
 

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Retro Adjacent Song Of The Day: John S. Hall & Kramer "The Party"

I say retro adjacent as I consider "retro" to refer to the 80's and this little number is from the 90's.  Another kick ass song (and my 2nd youtube upload) from the 1991 avant garde album from King Missile frontman  John S. Hall and multi-instrumentalist/producer Mark Kramer titled "Real Men".  I love this album in all it's poetic quirkiness and this is one of my favorite tracks off the album...hope you enjoy!

Birthday Tribute for Jim Henson: Dr. Teeth & Electric Mayhem "Can You Picture That"

Today would have been Jim Henson's 73rd birthday, sadly we lost him in 1990. Jim was possibly the worlds greatest puppeteer, an American icon and rare talent indeed! The Muppet show, the Muppet movies and The Dark Crystal are among my favorites and Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem totally kick ass! "Can You Picture That" is from the original Muppet Movie from 1979...classic. So, here's to Jim! Happy Birthday!!
(And a very Happy Birthday to RTB Blog follower, Mammacat2!)

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Sarah McLachlan : NEW single "One Dream"

Sarah McLachlan has been a favorite songstress of mine since 1990/91, producing some beautiful and memorable work to be sure.  Unfortunately she has been silent for far too long (SIX YEARS!)...well, today the silence broke and less than 30 min. ago she uploaded her new single "One Dream"  I am too excited!  Hope you enjoy!

Sarah McLachlan - One Dream by nettwerkmusicgroup

Blu: "COMBO" A Collaborative Animation

Blu is an Italian street graffiti artist.  I first came across his work via a clip at World of Wonder earlier this month entitled "Muto".  It was amazing!  Well, he's done it again this time teaming up with painter/film maker David Ellis for the collaborative effort titled "Combo" a time lapse animation masterpiece clocking in at just over 8min.  Enjoy & pass it on!  Link to Blu's site here and David Ellis here.

Beyonce: sings "Halo" to little girl at show in Sydney

Not much makes me cry...ever, but this just brought tears to my eyes.  Perhaps it's having children that has made me so emotional whenever I hear or see something sad or touching involving little ones.  This little girl, suffering from leukemia, had a dream realized thanks to Beyonce.  This lady is truly a class act!  If the handing over of her spot light at the VMA's to Taylor Swift didn't convince you then this surely will!  Simply beautiful....

RTB Blog Post #50: Pet Peeves (aka Shit that drives me crazy!)

Ok, so I was sitting here wondering what I would post this morning as my 50th post on the blog.  Well, it didn't take too long to decide after watching a video clip from the Dalai Lama's visit to Memphis got me worked up about one of my big pet peeves!  So I decided to post some of the things that get my blood boiling....

1) This stupid ass "fist bumping" thing!  WTF?  Shake my fucking hand or don't. Period.  I think this is just the stupidest thing ever!  I just don't get it, and here is a perfect example of just how fucking retarded this shit is!
  Can you even believe this tool?!! "fist bumping' -even the name is ridiculous!- his Holiness the Dalai Lama!!  WHAT a douche!

2) Poking me on Facebook!  Again, WTF!??  If you're on FB and wish to initiate contact, great!  I mean, that's what it's for, right?  Quick & easy, you say "hi" or respond to a post I've made, great!  What is with the poking?  I just simply DO NOT get it!  Is it so difficult to expend the energy to type the word "HI"?  Stop poking me!

3) People who do not follow through!  This one covers many aspects in life but the example that comes to mind (as it happens ALL the time) is saying you will call me or call me back.....and then you don't!  I understand shit comes up, you can't always plan on things going smoothly, I get it, but when you become a habitual offender it pisses me right the fuck off!  RUDENESS!!!!  If you cannot call me back at the time you specified that's fine (once in a while) just call as soon as you are able even if it's just to say "can't talk now, just needed to let you know" or whatever, I'm a big boy, I understand life happens.  This also goes to you assholes who constantly break plans!  Stop making plans if you know you are not EVER going to follow through!

4) People who are late all the time.  GET A FUCKING WATCH PEOPLE!!  Do you need to go back to the 3rd grade to learn how to tell time?  Seriously, this is one of the biggies!  It drives me absolutely bat shit crazy you people who think the world can just wait on your ass....it is not cool!  Here's a good way to remember for future reference if you ever make plans with me....a quote I got somewhere (let me know if you know where this came from, but I'm doubting if your ass is late all the time you'd be the one to tell me!)

"If you're early, you're on time.  If you're on time, you're late and if you're late DON"T EVEN BOTHER SHOWING UP!"  Got that?!  Seriously, treat your friends, acquaintances, family or colleagues with a little more respect and get there when the fuck you say you will!

5) People BLASTING (C)rap music in their cars!  You want to go deaf listening to talentless rappers "singing" about bitches, ho's, their rims and latest bling bling...be my fucking guest!  But keep that shit off the roads, out of the parking lot of the grocery store or the elementary school where I pick up my children!  We don't want to hear you sad ass excuse for "music" thump-thump-thumping enough to rattle my fillings loose, screaming obscenities and degrading women!  You're not impressing anyone.

6) People using "words" like "kewl", "sup", "wassup", "boi"...or any other fucktard way of twisting the spelling of a real word!  I HATE IT!!  It doesn't make you cool or hip, you sound like a douche!

7) Let me preface this by saying I'm not singling anyone out but....People who can't tell the difference between "to" and "too" or "your" and "you're" or "then" and "than" or "there" and "their" and "they're"....I know I'm not the most educated, and I get things wrong from time to time but I do give a damn about how I come across and make every effort to put my proverbial best foot forward!  If I don't know how to spell something, I LOOK IT UP!  I mean you're on the internet, the world at your finger tips....take a moment and get it right people!!!

Ugh!   I'm all worked up now!  LOL!   I guess I'll keep it to 7 for now although I could go on.....what pisses you off?  Do you agree with any on my list or have an opposing view?  (even though  you're wrong :)  go ahead and let me hear it!

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

New Single: Alicia Keys

Alicia Keys has been a favorite artist of mine since she burst on the music scene in 2001 releasing her 12 x's platinum debut "Songs in A Minor"  Here is a new single, released just today!  "Doesn't Mean Anything"  I'm sure this means we can expect a new album soon...can't wait!  If you haven't checked it out, her 2007 album "As I Am" is killer and I think her best to date!

The vids I have posted of the song have been removed 3 times so the best I can do is link you to the song here.

Punk Flashback: Elton Motello "Jet Boy Jet Girl" (Lyrics possibly *NSFW*)

 Elton Motello is both the moniker of Alan Ward (aka Alan Timms, formerly a member of Bastard along with Damned guitarist Brian James), the lead singer and songwriter, and the name of the band itself. Debuting in 1977 on Belgian record label Pinball.

This first came to my attention 20 yrs. later on the kick ass John Waters (the self-proclaimed master of "bad taste") compilation CD "A Date With John Waters " 

"Jet Boy, Jet Girl" is a risqué song about a 15-year-old boy's sexual relationship with another guy, who then rejects him for a girl. With its chorus of "ooh ooh ooh ooh, he gives me head," it has been embraced as something of a gay punk anthem.

This song KICKS ASS!




Weird fetish?

Apparently there really IS a website for every weird, pervy guy out there.  BLECH!

Graphic Tee Tuesday

I thought this was so funny!  Maybe it's just me.....? 


Best of Craigs List (*NSFW*)

An open letter to the purchasers of porn from your friendly adult store clerk.

#8 is my favorite!





[Via Craigs List]

The youth of today: God help us!

This little gem comes courtesy of Lamebook, one of my new favorite websites!  Filled with reposts of some of the dumbest, hysterical and down right disconcerting Facebook exchanges out there.


Madonnna: New song "Revolver"

Here is the second new track off Madonna's latest greatest hits pkg. "Celebration" released today.  The only other new track is the previously released "Celebration"  Unfortunately, this song features Lil Wayne who I personally find rather disgusting but I guess Madge is just trying to stay relevant by working with some currently popular "artists"

The Origin of Stupidity: Possibly *NSFW*

This video was brought to my attention by the wonderful Betty Bowers, America's Best Christian!  Here is Betty's description of the post:

"Foreign harlot persecutes Christian tv-has been Kirk Cameron for his godly hobby of fibbing for Jesus about Evil-ution"


Both humorous, and insightful, it's definitely worth the watch!



You can watch the original lies video here

Music: New Release Tuesday

The following albums are released today:

Putumayo "Putumayo Presents: Espana",
Regina Spektor "Far",
Former Matchbox 20 front man Rob Thomas delivers the solo effort "Cradlesong",
Paul Oakenfold "Perfecto: Vegas",
Paloma Faith "Do You Want The Truth Or Something Beautiful" (she sounds as if imitating Duffy, Adele & Amy Winehouse's sound...nothing original, but listenable and gets my vote for best album cover!)

Hope Sandoval & The Warm Inventions "Through The Devil Softly" fronted by former Mazzy Star lead, psychedelic dream pop chanteuse & uber hottie Hope Sandoval.....mmmmm, dreamy!
Manu Chao "Baionarena" (his 1998 debut "Clandestino" had me grooving for years!),
Wilco "Wilco (The Album)",
Imogen Heap of Frou Frou releases her third solo disc "Ellipse",
electro golden boy and Herman Melville relative Moby releases his 9th studio album "Wait For Me",
Zero 7 "Yeah Ghost",
And of course Madonna "Celebration" 1 & 2 disc versions and "Celebration: The Video Collection" containing a career spanning 47 videos!

Below are two videos to coincide with the new releases. The first being my personal fave of the bunch, Regina Spektor "Eet" and Moby's "Pale Horses" feat. vocals by Amelia Zirin Brown. Enjoy! UPDATE: Apparently I can't trust Billboard to give me the correct release dates as I found out Regina Spektor was in fact released June 23rd. Oh well, I love her so I'm leaving it!





Monday, September 21, 2009

Retro Tune of the Day: Thompson Twins "Lay Your Hands On Me"

One of my favorites from the 80's, Thompson Twins were originally formed in 1977. There were several lineup changes and finally, in early 1982, the trio we know today was finally solidified (founding member Tom Bailey, Alannah Currie and former band roadie Joe Leeway) They were awesome! And seriously, who else rocked the xylophone?!!

This song comes off the album Here's To Future Day's from 1985, reaching #5 on the UK album charts and #20 in the US, with "Lay your Hands On Me" reaching #13 & #6 respectively. (sadly, that was the highest they ever managed to chart in the US)

Joe Leeway left the group in 1986 while Tom & Alannah continued on for another 7 yrs.

Emmys Fashion: WTF was she thinking!!??

B Soap actress Victoria Rowell (Drucilla Barber on Young & The Restless) must have snorted some of the bad shit before she got dressed in this presidential tablecloth fuckery for last nights Emmys. First of all, the election is over, he won!  Second, stop shopping for red carpet fabrics at your local Wal-Mart super center discount bin....this bitch needs a fashion intervention STAT!




Mr. Blackwell is surely spinning in his grave!

This Week In Holy Crimes...(via Joe.My.God)

Over the last seven days...


California: Pastor Jessica Banks sentenced to life in prison for physically and sexually abusing her five adopted daughters.


Illinois: Jung Hee Chang charged with trespassing for refusing the leave the home of a woman who did not want her soul prayed for.


Ohio: Pastor Dale Griffin charged with six counts of raping a parishioner.


California: Pastor Lonnie McGowan charged with defrauding an 86 year-old parishioner of over $500K.


Maryland: Rabbi Jay Wagner charged with embezzling funds from the Orthodox school where he is vice principal.


Florida: Pastor Ronnie McGill, who is serving a 20 year sentence for real estate fraud, re-offended from behind bars by using the phone to attempt to con someone out of $40K for a new church.


Arizona: Youth Pastor Joshua O'Bannion confesses to sex with 14 year-old female congregant.


North Carolina: Pastor James William Rupard arrested for selling fake insurance policies. Thirty years ago Rupard was convicted of murdering his grandparents.


Connecticut: Convicted child molester Father Paul Stanley has assembled over 100 scientists and psychologists to discount the validity of repressed memory syndrome, which was used by witnesses against him.


Nova Scotia: Seventy men will share a $13M class action settlement for sexual abuse by Roman Catholic priests, providing a court certifies the offer made by the church. Three priests have been convicted in the case.


Florida: Father David Dueppen slapped with restraining order by stripper who claims he fathered her baby. She claims he threatened to kill her and her baby if she persisted in her demand for a DNA paternity test.


This Week's Winner--
Missouri: Father Gerald Howard has been accused of child molestation by three more men after word got out that Howard had changed his name after confessing to the same crime in 1982. Howard says that Catholic Church authorities had told him to change his name after the conviction, then transferred him from New Jersey to Missouri under the new name. News of Howard's former name came out earlier this summer when Mark McAllister, now 39, received a $600K settlement from the church. McAllister says that Howard kept up his sexual relationship with him even after pleading guilty to molesting him.


[Via Joe.My.God]

Monday Cartoon: Facebook



[via xkcd.com]

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Quote of the day

"Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends"

~Francis Bacon from "Love Is the Devil: Study for a Portrait of Francis Bacon"


Amazing A capella : Sam Tsui "MJ Medley" & Journey's "Don't Stop Believing"

I know my posts have been pretty prolific, but I just couldn't sit on this!  I just stumbled upon this amazing singer Sam Tsui whose a capella Michael Jackson medley blew me away!  Not since I first heard British a capella group The Flying Pickets cover the Yaz classic "Only You" have I been this excited about a capella.

This guy is an amazing talent, singing all parts of both the medley and the Journey cover (technically not  a capella but worth including here)  I hope you enjoy this as much as I did!



Revenge of the Smooth Jazz hater....

Here is a very funny animated video called "Distraxion".  It's the stuff of my Kenny G nightmares but in works out in the end....good stuff!  I know a few people who put on the smooth jazz station and it's just unbearable!  It's like being stuck at the dentists office for hours....why people, why!??

News of the Weird: Michigan Edition

Kenneth Reppke, 54, was charged with assault in Fraser, Mich., in July for allegedly smacking a woman in the head, knocking off her glasses, because she refused to sell him Boardwalk and Park Place in a Monopoly game. [Detroit Free Press, 7-30-09]


[Via Chuck Sheperd's "News of the Weird"]


 

Classic "Rock" song of the day: Cat Stevens "Moonshadow"

One of my all time favorites. Period.  This song always has and always will hold a very special place in my heart.  It reminds me of the good times growing up in the 70's.  Cat Stevens "Moonshadow" from the wonderful 1971 album Teaser and the Firecat.  The album reached #2 on the Billboard charts and as of 2001 has reached Triple Platinum status and the song reached #10...it will always be a #1 to me!

  It is also the title of a children's book written and illustrated by Cat Stevens. The story features the title characters from the album cover, top-hatted young Teaser and his pet Firecat, who attempt to put the moon back in its place after it falls from the sky. Published in 1972, the book has been out of print since the mid-1970s.


In 1977 an animated version, narrated by Spike Milligan and using the song "Moonshadow", was a segment in Fantastic Animation Festival.  I would imagine it's pretty rare and few have seen...so here you go, enjoy!


Giddy Up!

Whilst making my morning blog checks for the latest in all things wonderful and noteworthy, I came across this little film of equine fuckery via WoW.  Now, I'm all for people's freedom of sexual expression (so long as it doesn't involve certain things ie: children, scat, blood or real animals) and think a kinky fetish or two can even be a healthy way to keep the passion alive between consenting adults.

It may not be my cup of tea per se, but to each their own, right?  Well, get a load of this bizarre pony play (don't worry, it's nothing overtly sexual) I mean,really, WTF!??  I just don't get it...and apparently it doesn't stop there!  This guy gets body painted and dressed up like several other animals as well click here if you want to see more!



Saturday, September 19, 2009

ATTN: COMMENTERS

Firstly, thank you for your input, interest and taking the time to comment! Unfortunately, I have no idea who is saying what unless you sign your posts....or, I'm assuming, if you're following my blog and are logged in (see Google "follow" widget on left side of the page to do so)

Thanks again, I look forward to reading your comments!

Keep F***ing That Chicken: The Remix

I really was planning on avoiding this whole incident but then someone went and  remixed it with Tori Amos!  I was rendered powerless and just had to include this little gem for you.

So, here's what happened as the precursor to said remix: WNYW Fox 5 New York anchor Ernie Anastos uttered the mother of all fleeting expletives on the Fox 5 News At 10 on Wednesday, September 16, 2009....And here we go, the club version of "Fucking That Chicken"  I hope somewhere in NY clubland there's a DJ with a wicked sense of humor who will spin this tonight when things get in full meth fueled swing! (Warning:NSFW)


Retro tune of the day (mini post) : Amanda Lepore "I Know What Boys Like"

So, although it's not an official retro as it's a cover of one, I couldn't help but post this fuckery of a "live" performance by tranny trainwreck, Heatherette model & LaChapelle muse Amanda Lepore.  I just find her fascinating ! (in a Jocewlyn Wildenstein kind of way) Anyway, she seems to be all the rage at New York left of center fashion shows and underground clubs....so, here you go, a Cover of The Waitresses classic "I Know What Boys Like"

In poor taste (but oh so funny!)

I have a thing for graphic tees....I just love them even though I'm probably a bit out of the target demographic.  One of my favorite sites for hysterical, irreverent & politically incorrect shirts is T-Shirt Hell.  They have some of the funniest shirts I have ever seen!  Including this one:


Porntastrophe: The apparent dangers of Google Image search in the work place!

I was instructed, as a prerequisite to including this story on my blog, to preface that it happened to my STRAIGHT brother (we'll call him Mr. X) and promised to change the names and locations to protect the, um, innocent (?)

I was getting ready to leave work yesterday and stopped by to wish a good weekend to some of my friends.  As usual, one started talking rugby with me, but this time rugby league instead rugby union.  He was talking about one of the players that they showed in a show on Thursday; the man had huge legs and Hulk Hogan, a guest on the show, when asked about how big this players thighs were commented "yeah, they're almost as big as my arms."

So my friend was asking me who this player was.  I rattled off a few names, and when we had decided that it wasn't an islander (which seemed most likely to me) but a white guy, I thought of a Brisbane Broncos player but I couldn't remember his name.  My friend didn't think it was him, he thought it was a player from another team, teams that were not even playing.  He eventually decided to look up the player I was suggesting might be the right one.

Off to the Brisbane Broncos web site's Team page.  I quickly spotted the player, David Taylor.  A click on his head shot brings up his profile - with the same head shot.  Not much to help confirm it was him (except that at 115Kg he is a slab of meat).  My friend then goes off to Google the player and switches over to Google Images.

The first thing I see is what looks to be a sumo wrestler, I quickly scan to the left only to find that there are more penises on offer than you would probably find at Sydney's Gay & Lesbian Mardis Gras (Warning: NSFW).  David Taylor is a gay porn star.  My friend quickly closes the browser only to find that our manager had just been walking behind us and also saw.  We're talking sackable offence.

I couldn't believe it.  I was stunned.  The bank that we work at filters and blocks so much content that we often find we are unable to get information we need to do our job.  Blogs, forums, ads (I don't mind that too much), Internet based email, YouTube, and a whole range of other things are blocked.  To the point that I bring my laptop in with a wireless modem so I can look at IT forums and blogs when I run into problems and need to see how other people have resolved them, or need to download some program or library.  But what the hell, so long as gay porn can get through there is still hope that one day I too can find what I am looking for without needing my laptop - but I guess I would have to get on my hands and knees and beg for it.  Maybe that's why around here they use the expression "heads down, bum up" for working hard.

Well, this is who and what my friend was talking about -

And the Darwin Award goes to....

(January 2002, Italy) A violent attack on an innocent man? Andreas, a 23-year-old ex-bouncer from Italy, was found lying in a pool of blood near a country road. Police initially mistook him for a victim of sadistic mutilation. His left leg had been nearly severed by a chainsaw. His last act was an emergency call to operators who heard only a "death rattle." By the time help arrived, copious bleeding had drained his body of blood.
Sad plight? Not quite.The incredible truth was far odder.

Andreas had conspired with his cousin in an insurance scam. The 29-year-old accomplice confessed that he was the "assailant" who attacked--and inadvertently killed--the younger man in a mutually planned insurance fraud that went badly awry.

Andreas had convinced his cousin to cut his left leg off with a chainsaw in order to reap nearly a million dollars from numerous insurance policies. Permanent disability was all that was required. Andreas relied on his cunning, and his knowledge of first aid, to survive the chainsaw incident.
The attack took place near a country lay-by. The cousin sawed Andreas' leg below the knee, and severed a major artery in a gambit timed too close for survival. Emergency crews arrived to find Andreas dead and his cousin fled, tossing the chainsaw in a river on the way out of town.
The cousin now languishes in a cell on homicide charges. Andreas' death was a classic example of fate noticing those who buy chain saws.



[via Darwin Awards ]

Friday, September 18, 2009

Retro tune of the day: Doctor & The Medics

Well, when I first thought to include Doctor & The Medics in the retro line up I thought the obvious choice would be to post their great cover of Norman Greenbaum's "Spirit In The Sky"....but that's just too expected so I opted for the lesser known "Burn" ....and I really love this song from their major label debut for IRS records (coincidentally also the label for yesterdays retro post) titled "Laughing At The Pieces"

While the former was a world wide smash, reaching #1 in 32 countries, the latter only charted as high as #29 on the UK charts.  I still love it and it's one of my faves off that album.  Gotta love the psychedelic inspired garb, the huge 80's hair and KISS meets kabuki makeup!

Feeling defeated today...

So, I'm feeling pretty down and defeated today.  I'm really trying to stay focused, positive and hopeful about attending LCC this semester but it's not looking good.

I am financially unable to procure the necessary text books and supplies (scrubs, gait belt, shoes, lab kit, etc...) until I am assured financial aid reimbursement.  I cannot be assured financial aid until I am registered for the course.  I cannot register for the course until at least two people drop which may not happen until the course start date by which time I am expected to have all my supplies for the course.

One of the supplies, the gait belt, requires purchase with LCC's Starcard.  I cannot obtain a Starcard until I am registered.

And, to top it all off my ex, Lori, is being sent to Africa for work on Oct. 30th. and returning Nov. 16th  That is about the halfway point of my course when I have a midterm due not to mention class, labs & on site training 4 days a week from 8:10am to 3:30pm.  And it's looking like I will be responsible for watching the kids from about 4pm-7:30am for approx. 15 of those days.

I just don't see how the fuck this will be possible and I'm losing hope of fulfilling my goal at this time.  Although I am happy for the opportunity Lori has been offered, I can't help but be upset at the poor timing and am especially pissed and still bitter over the fact that I was the last to know this information!!  I've known this for less than a week, all the while making plans, fulfilling pre req's and working hard towards my goal of getting into this course.  Everyone else has known for weeks and I was kept in the dark for reasons unknown to me.

I just want to throw my hands up and give in at this point.  I really don't know what to do or think any more.  Lo is coming over this Sunday to discuss the schedule.  I'm also more than a little pissed at the fact her mother refuses to watch the kids over night AT ALL while Lo is gone.  It is HER daughter that is going away NOT my mothers!  GRRRR!!!

Ok, I just needed to vent, get some of this off my chest and will hopefully feel a little better getting it out there....now pass the boozamahol!!

You heard it here first!

According to a source from The Mirror Madonna and Janet Jackson met over dinner and allegedly discussed collaborating on a tribute song for Michael Jackson.  Hmmmm, this could be very interesting!   I'll keep you posted on any developments.....stay tuned!


Friday Mashup

Via Popbytes comes today's mashup: "I Got More Than A Feeling"  Combining two songs, Boston's "More Than A Feeling" and Black Eyed Peas' "I Got A Feeling", neither of which I'm crazy about separately but together make mashup magic thanks to Dutch producer Mad Mix Mustang.   Click here to get your party started!

MMMMMMM, cookies!

We all love cookies, right?  And homemade are the best!  Well, today I came across a new and unique recipe from the ever hilarious Betty Bowers (the worlds best Christian!) called "The Brutal Death of Our Savior Cookies"  As Betty says "A Christians place is in the kitchen, supervising the help!"  So, if you're in the mood to do some baking click here for the recipe!  Enjoy and be sure to share with your heathen friends!


Thursday, September 17, 2009

Retro tune of the day: FYC "Johnny Come Home"

I remember the first time I signed up for Columbia House's music club from an ad in Rolling Stone mag in the mid eighties...I had never heard of Fine Young Cannibals, but the name intrigued me and was enough to warrant a spot on my order list.  Well, the order arrived (I don't have any clue what else I ordered) and I've been hooked on this album ever since!  Debuting in 1985 this song went to #8 on the UK charts but only hit # 76 on the US Hot 100

Although I love this song and the album that spawned it, I HATE, HATE, HATE their follow up "The Raw and the Cooked" with that god awful hit "Good Thing"...BLECH!  Trivia: Apparently Jenny Jones (yes, THAT Jenny Jones) sang backing vocals and played drums on this album!  More Trivia: Fine Young Cannibals appeared as the house band in a nightclub in the 1987 comedy film "Tin Men"

Jude goes bowling @ Kiara's b-day party

Jude goes bowling

Showing my age or becoming more conservative?

Now, if you know me, you'll know I've been a Madge fan since the early 80's (OMG!  over 25 yrs!) and I have always applauded her creativity, media manipulation and boundary pushing, in your face sexuality at every stage of her career...she simply exudes sex from every pore.  I haven't always loved everything she's done, but you could say I've pretty much been "in her corner", defending her choices and remaining true.

Well, the time has finally come when I must disagree and strongly disapprove of something Madonna has done.  I see no plausible excuse for this decision in bad taste!  As a father of an impressionable young girl I find this highly offensive:



Up until Lourdes' cameo (all tarted up in Mama Madge's "Like a Virgin" look, Boy Toy belt included) I rather liked this second official video for her new single "Celebration"  But I must say I am both shocked and dismayed at her decision to have her 12 y/o daughter paraded around for the world to see in arguably one of her "sluttier" looks.....It pains me to say it, but SHAME ON YOU MADONNA!!  What do you think?  Would you feel differently if you had a young daughter?  Comment & let me know your thoughts!

Cautiously optimistic: LCC Orientation

So, I just got back from a 2 hr. course orientation @ LCC for Acute/Long Term Care CNA.  The issue of parking/detours was not as bad as I had expected and I arrived 20 min. early and found a spot in the Grand Ave. lot no problem.  Even better was the fact that right outside the parking lot was the building where I will be attending classes...win, win!

I arrived in plenty of time to the appropriate floor/classroom (1st one there!)  Apparently there had been some issue w/ getting the info to registered students for the course that there was orientation today and only about 10 of the 25 registered showed up (good news for me I hope!).

There was one other woman who attended who was also not registered, but the prof. stated whoever had contacted her first would get any available seat in the course and stated that was ME...woo hoo!

We covered a lot of information including pre req's, text books, scrub and footwear requirements (navy blue scrubs and *horrors!* white shoes)  I also found out that they had not stated correctly the TB test requirement and I will need to go take a second 2 step TB test, which is just more of an inconvenient annoyance than any real big deal.

The other pre req's include passing a blood born pathogens test and HIPAA/OSHA tests as well, all of which are available free of charge online, phew!

All in all I think it went well, and I have renewed hope that I will in fact get a spot this term.  I'll keep ya posted!
Me, ready for orientation @ LCC

Take a deep breath...

Today begins my long awaited foray into academia and I'm beginning to freak out!  I checked on the class web site (as I have several times a day, every day, for weeks now) and thought I saw a spot had finally opened up.  I made a mad dash to the Banner site for LCC students to finally register for the course....well, I hit a snag, called the Nursing Dept. and found I had not only read the information wrong, but that the class capacity had in fact been dropped from 25 to 24 with actual students registered remaining at 25.  This means not only can I not register today, but that I now need a minimum of TWO people to drop before I can register....GRRRR!!

I was however advised again to show up to orientation today (assuming I can navigate all the fucking detours that seem to be plaguing the ENTIRE city of Lansing) and also show up (unregistered) to the first day(s) of class in hopes someone will drop and my attendance will bode well with the course professor.

So, with paper bag in hand (for hyperventilating purposes), I will be on my way shortly to begin a new phase of my life in hopes of finding some semblance of a career and to make a positive change in moving forward after being stuck for such a long time.  Wish me luck!